Books With Friendships That You Aspire To (And One That You Don’t)

Happy International Day of Friendship everyone! In this post I am going to recommend books that feature friendship between two or more of the characters. Most of these you want to aspire to, but there is one that I don’t recommend (and I will point it out in due course). Also, some of these books have been recommended to me and I have yet to read them, but I still wanted to include them here because friendship is very prominent to the plot. Note: These books are in no particular order. So, let’s begin:

1. Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry

The friendship between Gus McCrae and Woodrow Call is the beating heart of this book (and the other books in the tetralogy). Lonesome Dove is “a profound meditation on friendship, duty, unrequited love [When Gus is dying, for example, he spends his last hours trying to get Call to speak, to acknowledge what they’ve been to each other and Call can’t do it. He remains silent and the love between them remains unspoken and therefore, for Call, somehow, unreal and unrequited; it is when their friendship becomes the most tragic (It’s Been Quite a Party: Journey and Friendship in McMurtry’s West)] and the passing of an era”.

I agree. This book is a must-read of contemporary American literature.

2. The Saxon Stories by Bernard Cornwell

Uhtred of Bebbanburg is a warrior who was born a Saxon but raised as a Viking. In a battle against the Danes at the beginning of the series, Uhtred’s father is killed, he is taken captive, and his uncle Aelfric allies himself with the invaders to usurp the rightful title of Lord of Bebbanburg from his nephew. So, Uhtred spends most of the series fighting (his uncle) to get back what is rightfully his, but his love for Ragnar and the people who raised him, remains steadfast.  His conflicted loyalties between the two―the fortress he loves and the family who gave him a home― thus drive the entire story.

Along the way, however, Uhtred makes unbreakable and steadfast bonds of friendship with several other characters. The first is Father Beocca, a Christian priest who knew Uhtred as a child and who is now his moral anchor, a secret ally, and his emotional tie to his lost Saxon heritage. The second is Ragnar the Younger, his foster brother. Despite political and religious divides between the two, none of those divides are strong enough to get in between the deep bond of brotherhood they have. Another, and this one is my favorite, is Finan, an Irish warrior and prince who meets Uhtred when they are both slaves and they begin to rely on each other to survive. Finan eventually becomes Uhtred’s fiercest companion, second-in-command, and lifelong brother-in-arms. Frankly, this relationship is one of the best things about the entire series. And finally, Hild, a former nun, who later takes up sword and armor and becomes one of Uhtred’s most steadfast and trusted confidantes.

This is one of my favorite series of all time. And the TV adaptation series from Netflix is one of the best TV shows ever. Watch it.

3. The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien

Friendship is central to this story, as it is the driving force that defeats evil. Merry and Pippin, for example, prove themselves to be true friends when they refuse to leave Frodo alone and let him face danger by himself. But the friendships I want to highlight the most here are Frodo and Sanwise Gamgee and Legolas and Gimli.

Sam represents ultimate devotion, loyalty and sacrifice. It is his relationship and friendship with Frodo that defeats and triumphs over the ring and its corrupting evil. Legolas and Gimli’s relationship, on the other hand, develops from shared experiences and mutual respect as warriors. They “exemplify the transformative power of friendship. They shatter the brittle barriers of prejudice and hostility through their unlikely alliance, revealing the profound depths of shared experience and unspoken understanding” (The Philosophy of Friendship in J.R.R. Tolkien’s ‘The Lord of the Rings’).

4. City of Thieves by David Benioff

The friendship between the two main characters of this book―Lev Beniov and Kolya Vlasov―is an unlikely, deep bond forged by shared danger, humor, and endless bantering. Although both of them are initially forced to spend time together and do the impossible―find a dozen eggs for a wedding cake in occupied Russia or face execution―their bond transforms to such an extent that it “defines the emotional core of the book, proving that human connection and loyalty can persist even in the most inhumane settings” (Tower of the Hand Blog; Review: City of Thieves).

I liked this book more than I had expected, and I highly recommend it.

5. A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaleed Hosseini

Another example of the transformative power of friendship is found in A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaleed Hosseini. The friendship in this book transforms from initial hostility to an indestructible bond of survival, love, and sacrifice between two women, Mariam and Laila. This is a story of domestic abuse set in a harsh, inhospitable, and unstable outside world. Set in Afghanistan during the country’s bellicose and turbulent history in the 20^th century, Mariam’s initial hostility towards Laila transforms into a sisterhood when their shared suffering (at the hands of their cruel husband Rashid) bridges the gap between them. Eventually, they learn to protect each other from Rashid’s physical violence and in an act of ultimate sacrifice, Mariam kills Rashid to save Laila’s life and give her a chance of a future and freedom.

This book is female friendship at its best, where the protagonists transform their relationship from reluctant co-wives to fierce protectors of one another against brutal oppression.

6. The Neapolitan Novels by Elena Ferrante

The relationship between Elena Greco and Raffaella (Lila) Cerullo in these novels is “defined by deep love, fierce competition, intellectual reliance and mutual envy. This relationship is the core engine of the entire series, and it shapes the protagonists’ identities from childhood in a poor neighborhood through adulthood” (What it means to be female: The Neapolitan Novels).

This series is very popular and I started seeing it everywhere this year. One of my book clubs even read it in its entirety during the summer. However, I could not get into it. The English translation didn’t do it for me, and I could never immerse myself in the story enough to care about the protagonists. However, I do know that it is about a life-long friendship between two women who met as kids in a poor neighborhood in Naples. I tried to read this twice, and I couldn’t get very far into the first book either one of those times so I will not try again but someone else might like it and that is why I decided to include it in this list.

7. The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas

Another book about friendship that I didn’t like is The Three Musketeers by Alexandre Dumas. Friendship in this book is defined by the motto “All for one, one for all”, unwavering loyalty and shared sacrifice. The bond between these four men is based on mutual trust, collective accountability, and putting each other first over everyone else. And all of this, transforms Athos, Porthos, Aramis and D’Artagnan from individual brothers to brothers whose unbreakable bond supersedes political laws and romantic pursuits.

I did not like this book (Alexandre Dumas is not an author for me), but many do and the friendship in this book is the main reason why this book occupies the spot it does in classical literature canon.

Now, onto the friendship that I didn’t care for.

8. The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt

Built on shared trauma, the friendship between Theodore “Theo” Decker and Boris Pavlikovsky from Donna Tartt’s novel The Goldfinch is one that I didn’t like. Theo and Boris are both neglected by their abusive and alcoholic fathers and they have both lost their mothers. Hence, they find each other and become each other’s family. Their bond is further strengthened by reckless behavior such as heavy drinking and doing drugs. But what I didn’t like about this relationship is that Boris betrays Theo. During a blackout, Theo confesses to Boris that he stole the painting The Goldfinch, and Boris later steals it to use as collateral in the criminal underworld (Wikipedia, The Goldfinch). The whole point of this arc is to prove that true friendship can survive betrayal and dishonesty, but the truth of the matter is, it cannot. Trust is broken. If a friend betrays you, he was never your friend. Period. After this theft was revealed, like 70% into the book, I DNF’d it.

In my opinion, friendship should look like this:

9. Frog and Toad by Arnold Lobel

“Frog and Toad’s friendship is the stuff of legend. No matter what, Frog and Toad are always (ALWAYS!) there for each other — just as best friends should be. And they do EVERYTHING together. Like finding lost buttons and growing gardens together. Or when Toad bakes cookies, Frog helps him by eating them. When Frog and Toad are scared, they’re brave together. Now that’s a friendship (14 Unlikely Friendships in Children’s Books).”

10. Elephant and Piggie by Mo Willems

Gerald and Piggie are complete opposites. Gerald the Elephant is cautious and anxious. Piggie is happy and impulsive. Their relationship is based on trust, emotional support, and accepting each other’s differences. These books are valuable to readers young and old. I highly recommend them.

That is everything for today. May you pick some of these books up and love some of them as much as I do. Happy International Friends Day!